Looking Put Together, Perfect, Effortless
I can put an outfit on that looks polished, put together, effortless, and maybe even perfect.
All nice things... that don't necessarily embody who I am.
I can put together outfits like this and so can you, but it doesn’t mean I’m necessarily going to feel really good in it, and it definitely doesn’t mean I’m going to feel like myself in my clothes.
Wearing an outfit that does embody me, might not be up to other people’s standards of what is fashionable, but do I ever feel like myself in it. Which makes me feel confident in what I wear, and not worry if it’s enough for anyone else. It's simply enough for me (and it's so much more than enough).
Figuring out how to infuse who you are into your personal style and the clothes you wear is what I help you do so that you can feel like your amazing self in your clothes, and let that shine instead of worrying about looking a certain way. ALSO listen to the podcast episode "Style Goals" if you want to discover what style aligns with who you are.
Essentially this boils down to: dressing "well" Vs having your own style.
The difference between looking put together but feeling like you don’t actually have something you can call your own, versus having something you created that is your own that you feel at home in, and you dress well as a by product of creating your own personal style.
One is created outside of you where you don’t get to make the decisions and you are at the whim of society's standards.
The other is created within and you hold all the power/choice.
Personal style Coaching teaches you how to embrace, embody, and accept who you are instead of being afraid or ashamed of her.
It’s fine if you want to look put together, but ask yourself what that means to you. Write out what that means to you so you don’t have to constantly guess at what that means or if something is put together enough. You’ll have your definition of what that is.
Also ask "why do I want to look put-together, perfect, polished, or effortless?"
Find out if this is coming from within you or from a societal narrative.
I spent years trying to create a style that was exactly those things because I thought other women looked polished, put-together, effortless, and perfect, so I should too (like it would make me happier) if I wanted to be considered someone other people valued.
It took me a very long time to realize I wasn't consulting myself whatsoever, which is what made me feel powerless and at the whim of societal norms/trends.
It also made my closet an overwhelming mess of in-cohesive pieces. So even though I could look put together to others to some degree, I had no style, and I didn't really know what I actually loved to wear still. I've mentioned this before, but it's what made style feel shallow and vein and unfulfilling.
Flash forward to now, my opinion, values, and style is clear to me because I chose to discover what actually mattered to me, and when I gave myself the time and space to make that a priority, being put-together was not at the top of my list of what I actually wanted my style to be.
Don't get me wrong, I like feeling like I have my shit together, but my clothes don't create that. What creates that is that I have discovered and embodied my own style and feeling certain of myself is what makes me feel put together no matter what I am wearing.
Love & Trust Yourself