How to Get Out of Your Head
We can paralyze ourselves quite quickly when it comes to overthinking about what to wear let alone creating our personal style.
This post is going to explain how you can get out of your head when it comes to trying to figure out all things personal style.
There are 3 ways I like to go about doing this, that I think will help you too when you're tired of trying to figure out how to get your personal style just right.
The first thing I recommend is, Connecting To Your Heart:
Instead of trying to figure out how to look good today, go into your closet space and before you do anything close your eyes, put a hand over your heart and take some deep breaths.
Once you've centered yourself, ask yourself how you want to feel in your clothes today. You will probably have an urge to start thinking your way through this, but keep breathing and allow the thoughts to pass so that you can notice what would make you feel supported by your clothes today, not just what you think you should wear.
This might look like your body asking you for clothes that support rest and comfort, you could also notice a desire to have fun and feel playful.
Take your time with this and don't worry about creating an outfit or your personal style.
Instead, let yourself feel into what feels good to you and aligned with a deeper inner knowing. It's that feeling where it just clicks, and you didn't have to work through it with your mind to find it.
Sometimes our bodies and or emotions hold a lot of knowledge that is waiting to be heard. So take some time to quiet your mind and let yourself notice your gut instincts or natural intuition.
Once you notice the feelings you really desire to have in your clothes today, open your eyes and choose the pieces of clothing that match them.
You can do this with creating your personal style too.
Take some time to be in a quiet space alone and listen to what your body is craving and notice what naturally comes to mind from within you. It may take some time, but once you've let all of the external influences of life go for a moment you'll be able to get a better sense of what you want deep down and it won't require you to think through it. You'll feel yourself resonating with yourself.
Which leads me to the second thing you can do to get out of your head when it comes to style.
Notice What Resonates:
We all have different tastes when it comes to food, movies, music, books, art, and pretty much anything else the world offers.
Your taste in clothes isn't any different.
We are often told how we should dress to look right or good from a societal perspective, but I want to invite you to start noticing which clothes actually resonate with you.
We naturally gravitate towards certain music, movies, books, and art... and it starts with a feeling. You typically won't remember over thinking about any of these things, but you will remember how those things made you feel, because the feeling they give you is what draws you in.
For the most part you don't start trying to analyze why you like that song you just heard or not, you just know that you are feeling something you want to feel, and that you vibe with it.
Imagine doing this with clothes.
Not worrying about if something is in style, if someone "like you" should be wearing it, or if others will like it, and simply noticing if when you look at it you feel drawn to it.
Try doing just this one thing (picking the clothes that evoke feelings within you that you like) and see how good your outfit choices and personal style start to feel.
Pick your clothes, like you pick your music; for yourself.
The last thing I can't recommend enough is: Using Your Emotions as a Guide
Stop overthinking style. It is very simple. Personal style is about what feels good to you.
You don't have to make it more complicated, and you don't have to make it mean more than that.
You just have to be willing to notice the way you feel, and decide if you want to feel that way in your clothes.
This is different from noticing what resonates in the sense that you can use all of the emotions you are experiencing around clothes to make better decisions about what you wear, buy, and hold onto.
Let your emotions do what they are meant to do; show you that you are aligned with what you really want, or not. Don't indulge in the bad ones and make them mean that you suck at style.
Let the uncomfortable feelings show you what you can let go of, and help you not fall into the trap of constantly trying to fit in.
An example of this would be:
There is a beautiful new trendy dress in a popular store. If you're in your head about it you might pick it up and hum and ha over whether you can pull it off, or if you even like it.
If you let your feelings guide you through it can look like this instead:
One woman sees it and notices she doesn't feel great about it so she keeps shopping. She doesn't try to make the dress work for her to please other people, and she doesn't tell herself it would never work for her, or that she needs to be different before she can wear something like that, she doesn't complicate or make a big story about why she doesn't want the dress, because she isn't trying to think her way through it. She simply notices it doesn't feel good to her and moves on.
She lets the uncomfortable emotion signal to her that this particular dress doesn't actually fulfill or satisfy her needs. She doesn't make it mean that she sucks at style just because popular clothes aren't her thing.
Another woman sees it and does feel great about it, so she decides to purchase it. She also doesn't purchase the dress to please other people, to motivate herself to be different, or in order to be considered stylish, she just knows that she feels good about it, and so she will enjoy wearing it. The dress satisfies her intrinsic wants, needs, and/or values.
Use your emotions as a guide. You don't need to know any rules, what's in or what's out, what's stylish and what's not. You just need to know if it feels good to you or if it doesn't.
Bad feelings and good feelings are there to help you discover what you really want to wear. Use them both to help you feel truly stylish.
BONUS:
Make your closet / dressing area a sacred space that puts you in a feel good place and makes you excited to go get dressed each day.
You can do this by decorating it in a meaningful way, have incense or candles burn in there, maybe a speaker with your feel good music, having a style vision board with inspiration pinned to your closet doors. You can add crystals to anchor certain emotions, or maybe even look up how to create a self love altar. It doesn't have to be spiritual either, you can simply add a really cozy rug, or some art that feels good to you too. Just make it your feel good space.
You can turn getting dressed into a self loving ritual by creating a space that feels good to enter and be in, and letting it set the tone for starting your day off feeling good about getting dressed.
If you want more help getting out of your head when it comes to deciding what to wear or how to actually create your personal style book a 1:1 complimentary consult call with me here.
Love & Trust Yourself