Creating Your Personal Style
Last week we talked about some of the ways you can discover what it is you really want when it comes to clothes and I mentioned that the next step is creating.
So, now that you know what you want, how do you make it real?
How do you get your personal style to be physically hanging in your closet ready for you to wear?
This is where creating comes in, taking action by physically creating every day is how you make your personal style real.
Below are 5 steps to start creating your personal style today, and start creating better.
Your first step is that you have to stop telling yourself why you can’t have what you want.
You have to stop telling yourself you can't wear that.
You have to stop telling yourself you'll never be stylish.
And you have to stop telling yourself you can't have your own personal style.
Whether it’s your body, your job, your family, or money.
If you are telling yourself you can't wear something or be stylish because of your body 100 times out of 100 this belief is not true. I know it can certainly feel true, especially if you've been in situations where people tell you you can't, or like the rest of women, you have been subjected to constant noise about how we "should" look.
I want you to click here and see just how many amazing things these women wear, and how stunning they look in their own personal style - it is possible for you to do the same, however you look.
If you're telling yourself you can't because of your job, there is nothing stopping you from making your work attire as close to what you really love wearing as possible. Plus you can wear whatever you want outside of work. Even if you are working in a corporate office and are required to adhere to a strict dress code there are ways to still feel like yourself in your clothes whether that's with unique suits, beautiful accessories, or underwear that makes you feel amazing. Figure out how to add more of you into the dress code.
If you aren't wearing what you want because of what family or friends will think and say we are working on an entirely different issue. You have to decide who's opinion means more to you before you can really start doing this, yours or someone else's, and come to peace with what you choose.
If you've been around for a while you know that my stance on this is that you choose you, mostly because your friends and family love you and your clothes shouldn't change that. If your family or friends claim that the way you dress is pushing them away it may be time to find a different inner circle if you want people that love you for you.
If you are telling yourself you can't create your own personal style because of money (we need to work on your abundance mindset but...) I want you to know that there are so many ways to have and create your personal style that do not cost a fortune. You can go to clothing swaps, thrift stores, garage/estate sales, ask friends to do an exchange, and you can take your time creating it. There are so many options and literally no rush.
Creating your personal style doesn't mean spending thousands of dollars on a new cohesive wardrobe so that you are perfectly dressed overnight. It means taking the time to find what you truly love and gaining a deeper understanding of what actually works for you, and money can't buy that.
I want you to make a decision right now before we go any further. Do you want to wear all of the things you desire to wear? Do you want to feel stylish? Do you want your own personal style? If the answer is yes keep reading!
The second step is to stop letting confusion win.
Confusion really knows how to hit the breaks on creation.
All I mean by this is you have to start catching yourself when you are saying "I don't know how to do this" or when you are feeling confused, and instead start reminding yourself that you're not supposed to know how to do it yet because you're figuring it out.
Sitting in confusion will feel convenient, like "there was nothing you could do", but it mostly just holds you back from creating what you really want and robs you of your power, confidence, and willingness to experience something new.
It's okay to feel confused, use it as a signal to start asking questions, and figuring out what you want to do, use it as a signal to be resourceful, or a signal to ask for help.
The third step is a willingness to fail and a willingness to succeed.
Are you willing to succeed at personal style? To be stylish, and wear whatever you want?
I hope you are saying yes to yourself because creating your personal style means believing you can. (If you struggle with believing you can that is where I come in with personal style coaching.)
Are you willing to fail at personal style? At being stylish and wearing what you want?
Failing doesn't mean you've fallen off the path and that everything has gone wrong when it comes to personal style. It means you're doing what stylish people do. You're taking risks. You're putting yourself out there. And you are discovering who you are and how to express that in your clothes.
Be willing to fail is just as necessary as being willing to succeed.
I want you to the think of the trend makers themselves. Every season there are runway shows from some of the most well known designers in the world. Every year there are critics at the ready to tear the designers work apart. When a designers work is found to be a failure and is heavily criticized, they could simply give up and claim that fashion just isn't for them anymore. But they don't, they continue designing and creating. The same way they don't let successful shows mean that they have mastered fashion and never need to bother creating again.
Creating your own personal style, from a single outfit to an entire wardrobe requires a willingness to succeed and fail. You can't be perfect, but you do get to believe you're capable of achieving what you want.
To start practising this step simply start wearing/creating new outfits. Have a favourite pair of pants? Start trying to style it with tops you normally wouldn't and vice versa. Track how you feel in each new outfit at the end of each day. Notice if any discomfort from wearing something new wore off throughout the day, and what you actually ended up feeling about the outfit underneath the initial discomfort.
The fourth step is fall in love with creating.
Touching on what was just mentioned about fashion designers being will to continue creating regardless of their latest success or failures. The other thing they have, that stylish people also have, is a love for creating.
Falling in love with the process of creating may be the best kept secret of how to be stylish.
Changing your mindset about picking out an outfit from being a typical mundane part of your day, or worse it feeling like a chore or painful, to something where you get to spend 5-10 minutes being as imaginative and creative as you please, trying many different pieces in many different ways to see what you like best is how you make this step easy.
It's also like "romanticizing" your life. How can you romanticize your morning outfit for your day? Can you start listening to music like you're the main character in a movie? Start burning a candle you love when you get ready? Maybe try thinking of what your favourite character would wear if she was in your closet and see where that feeling of inspiration takes you. Ask yourself what is one word that describes how you want to feel today and align your outfit with that. There are so many ways to do this but asking yourself how you can make this more fun, and how you can create a process that supports you in trying new outfits, and seeking inspiration is how you'll find your answers for what falling in love with creating looks like for you.
Everyone is different, so your inspirations, challenges, wins, and processes are going to look different, which is why it is important to figure these things out for yourself.
If you can do that, no failure will make you want to give up. You'll be inspired to continuously find what works for you.
The fifth step is practise.
The last thing creating comes down to is practise - consistently trying to uncover what actually works for you and what you really love wearing.
Personal style is an ongoing practise. We put on an outfit almost everyday of our lives, we can do it unconsciously, or we can do it on purpose. If you've ever heard of the compound effect it applies to your personal style too. It is not a race, and consistent practise is what will help you achieve your goal.
When you fall in love with creating, practising it becomes easy and making your personal style real does happen faster.
It does take time to create your personal style, but when you stop holding onto beliefs that don't serve you and choose to discover what matches your style goal and vision you'll start seeing changes right away that will create momentum for your to keep going.
Even if you don't physically change much of your wardrobe at first, the simple practise of being creative and changing your perspective about your wardrobe will have you wearing your clothes differently both externally, in the different combinations you create, and internally with the way you feel and how you carry yourself.
So try creating 7 new outfits you've never worn before in your closet this week and let me know how it goes!
Love & Trust Yourself